


Prank Report

by QuimeraTheTraveler



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU
Genre: Gen, Sibling Bonding, Sibling Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:21:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24918277
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuimeraTheTraveler/pseuds/QuimeraTheTraveler
Summary: A short interaction among the Batsiblings
Comments: 2
Kudos: 49





	Prank Report

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Talagand](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talagand/gifts).



“Okay, report’s done! Timmy, you turn it in”, Jason rambled, dropping the printed paper on his desk and scurrying off to a safe distance.

Instincts taking over, Tim stopped typing altogether and proof-read the sheet.

“NO”, he breathed out, swivelling on his chair to face the other’s retreating form. “Jason! I’m not turning this in for you!”, he yelled, stomping after him.

“What’s that? Can’t hear you!”, the older called back, fleeing into a couch room.

“What did you do?”, Steph squinted at them, looking up from where she had been scrolling through her phone with Cass slumped by her side.

“If you want to prank Bruce at least have a pair and go all the way!”, Tim jumped over an armchair to gain ground on Jason.

“Are you kidding? I want to see his reaction, not to have to be ready to run for my life!”

“This doesn’t make any sense! He’ll know you wrote it!”

“It’s a _common_ report!”

“I—I’m not giving him this!”, Tim gave up chasing Jason around, and squinted at the paper again.

“You can always re-write it!”, he called out, half hiding behind a bookshelf.

“You’d wish! Dick, you turn it in!”, Tim hurriedly let the sheet fall on the eldest’s chest and scrambled to walk away.

“What’s with the ruck—“, he started as he read along, and was interrupted by a snort of his own. “Okay, that’s a good one. But I won’t be the one giving this to Bruce. Cass, you do it: you’re B’s favourite, after all.”

Not knowing what she was getting herself into, she took the offered paper willingly, eyes flying over the lines.

Her hand flew to her face to cover her growing smile, but she shook her head and stood up quickly, walking over to were Damian was petting Ace.

“Damian”, she called, and let the report fall on his lap.

The boy picked it up.

“…I’m not doing it”, he tsked, and attempted to offer it back, but Cass raised her hands and stepped back hurriedly.

“Blood son”, she smirked, and fled.

“Exactly! That’s why I have to get to live, so I can fulfil my role as heir!”, he said as he stood up, considering who he should sneak the damned report to.

“Come on, Dami. We all know Cass is going to get the cape”, Barbara said, not looking up from her computer.

He took in a mouthful of air, ready to refute that, when Duke walked in, taking off his earphones.

“’Sup guys?”

“Duke! You give this to father! He likes you enough to break his ‘no metas in Gotham’ rule!”, Damian jumped to him and pulled on his shirt, trying to stuck the report there.

“Wha—Oh no. No, no no no! I just got here, don’t drag me into this!”, he flailed, looking for his next victim. “Jason, I bet this is on you!”, he said, and took a chance that he was distracted playing it as if he were checking out the books to sneak up on him and jam the paper between his belt and pants.

“Hey!”, Jason startled, and tried to grab for Duke, but he ducked away expertly. “Steph! My pal, my mate: we would take a bullet for each other, right?”

“A bullet, alright”, she hummed, already rolling away from her position on the couch. “But a prank report? No thanks.”

“This is…! Dick, YOU do it!”

“No, no no no no!”, he put his hands up, pointedly refusing to take the sheet. “You pull the prank and you shoulder its consequences! That’s how it goes!”

“But Dick!”, Jason said dramatically, holding the report against Dick’s chest. “What about your fans?!”

“Oh!”, he couldn’t help but play along, one hand going to pose dramatically over his forehead and the other sprawled against his chest.

Jason pulled back, leaving the report with the eldest.

“Wha—!? NO!”

All witnesses grinned madly, stepping away from him.

“No, no!”, Dick kept going, but everybody had their guards too high up to attempt to chase them.

Instead, he spotted the immaculate surface of a wooden table, and just set the paper down.

“I’m not turning it in! I am not!”, he declared, abandoning it there and leaving the room altogether.

A new sort of tension filled the space, as their eyes glanced from the report the each other, gauging who was going to brake first and pick it up.

The main candidate was Tim; whose eyes were already transfixed and fingers twitching minutely. Next in line was Duke; who wasn’t as far off as Tim.

Damian just huffed and went back to petting Ace.

Seconds ticked by, and Tim couldn’t take his eyes off of it.

“I—AAAHHHH!”, he faltered and gave up, picking up the sheet.

The others gave him a pitiful look. It was obvious he was going to lose his cool first.

Duke sighed in relief, happy to have resisted longer than Tim.

“Babs, you do it!”

“I’m busy”, she replied without missing a beat.

“Steph—!”

“Sorry, honey”, she singsong.

“Cass—!”

“No.”

“Jason!”

“Dude, I’m the one getting rid of it in the first place…”

“Damia—”

“Just give it here!”, the youngest sighed, rolling his eyes. “I have an idea!”

Tim practically dropped on his knees beside the boy, eyes glittering in gratefulness as a portion of the tension on his shoulders eased off. He almost couldn’t believe it when Damian actually took the report from him.

Only to stuff it in Ace’s mouth.

“Go get father”, he ordered the dog.

Ace stood up and galloped away.

The others watched him go for a moment before exchanging glances and creeping after him, pilling on the hallway where Bruce’s study was as the dog trotted inside to listen in.

“What do you have there, boy?”, Bruce looked up from his work laptop to pat Ace’s head, gently taking the report from him and straightening out.

Outside, the bat kids held their breath.

A tense, silent minute followed.

“This—“, Bruce started.

Jason leaned closer.

“—is unreadable…”

He dropped the crumpled, slobber-soaked piece of paper into the trash bin.


End file.
